I saw a post the other day that said,
"Preparing for just your birth and not postpartum is like preparing for your wedding day and not your marriage."
YES! Wow did that connect and also made me realize I needed to do better helping my clients be prepared for after birth as much as for during it. It's definitely a work in progress, but I didn't want to only give advice and information about planning for postpartum to my clients. So, I am sharing with you my tips for a positive postpartum experience!
Rest Rest Rest
Your body is going to go through major experience and will need lots of time to recover. Between the hormone shifts and healing wounds, your body needs to conserve energy to use it in areas it is needed most. Plan to do minimal activity in the first couple weeks. Have a setup for baby in your bedroom or wherever you plan to be for changing diapers and feedings. Keep items close by so you don't have to get up too often. Also, be close to a bathroom that has all your postpartum supplies ready to go. A bedside bassinet is super helpful for keeping baby close by and in a safe space. Also keeping baby close by helps you get to know your baby. Learning your baby's little sounds helps you learn your baby needs, which makes it easier for you to take care of your baby.
Your Village
A big part of you getting rest is figuring out who is your village. The saying, "It's takes a village" couldn't be truer after having a baby. Hopefully your partner can be home with you for the first few days or weeks. But not everyone is able to do that depending on their work. Having friends and/or family that can come be with you during those first few weeks can
make a huge difference. And let me tell you, people want to help! Making a schedule or sign up sheet can be helpful so you know ahead of time who will be coming to help you. But also, you need to set clear expectations. Having people come to hold the baby isn't going to be helpful at this stage. The goal is for you to be able to rest and bond with your baby. Let others do things like cleaning, cooking, laundry, watching other children, etc.
This is also where considering to hire a postpartum doula is a great idea! Especially if you don't have many friends or family close by. Postpartum doulas not only help you with keeping up the household, but they are a wealth of knowledge for newborn, breastfeeding and postpartum concerns.
Meals
Another way to help take some of the load off is planning ahead for meals. This can be done in a couple different ways. First, you can prep meals yourself a head of time and freeze them. Try using recipes that are high in protein, which is going to be helpful in the healing process after birth. Soups are also a great option! Here is a great book I would recommend for inspiration and education on meals postpartum. (https://a.co/d/8EMC024)
Another way of getting meals is setting up a meal train. Allowing others to bring meals to you is a great way to take the planning and cooking off your plate. You can use an app (MealTrain.com (official site) - Organize Meal Support in Minutes) or make your own sign up sheet to have people let you know when they can bring you a meal and what they will be making.
Support Groups
The postpartum period can be a rollercoaster both physically and mentally. Knowing where to turn for support or questions ahead of time will help you feel more prepared when concerns come up. And I say "when" because they definitely will!
One way to find this is right in your village. Having family or friends who have been through it before can be so helpful in guiding and supporting you during your postpartum journey. Sometimes, though, this can lead to differing opinions and unsolicited advice. Be picky about who you actually want advice from. No one should make you feel guilty or shameful. If that is the direction it is going, it is time to find help elsewhere.
Another way is through mom support groups. This can be on social media or in person. You can find in person groups through local hospitals or birth centers, churches or a quick online search. Being able to connect with other moms who are in it or have experience can be very affirming and relieve a lot of anxiety. Postpartum can feel quite lonely depending on your level of support. Being able to get together or even just talk to other moms during this time can help not only you, but also other moms!
So, do the research while you are pregnant and join the groups. This way you have the support ready to go when you need it and you may even learn some tips early on that will help you through.
What's Normal?
To me, this is crucial! Educating yourself about what is normal and what is not for you and your baby will help you feel more confident going into this stage of life.
Babies go through stages of growth spurts (Baby Growth Spurts: Timeline, Signs, and How to Cope ), which turns into cluster feedings and interrupted sleep patterns. Knowing when to expect those changes will help you better prepare and understand why your baby isn't acting the same as they were a few days ago.
Also educate yourself on lactation and bottle feeding. Making sure your baby has a good latch both at the breast and bottle can mean a world of a difference. And yes, I said at the bottle as well! Meet with a lactation consultant before giving birth or join to a class.
Knowing what to expect for yourself is very important as well. Your body is going to be having some MAJOR hormonal shifts, which will affect everything from your sleep and mood to breastmilk production and more! Being prepared for these changes will help you understand why you feel the way you do and how to work through it.
It is good to know, as well, what is normal and what is not for postpartum bleeding and recovery from birth, whether vaginal or cesarean section.
Be Prepared
This is basically the whole moral to the story; Be Prepared! Pregnancy, birth and postpartum is not something to go into blindly. The more you know ahead of time can affect how the rest of your experience goes, so I recommend doing your due diligence by educating yourself early and often. Hire a doula who is up to date on recommendations to help you navigate information overload. Take the classes and look into both hospital and out of hospital ones. Come up with a plan! You will be happy you did.
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